Dreams

Picked a daily devotional from YouVersion.  Joyce Meyer's Promises For You.  Today's verse was Proverbs 29:18.  She talks about dreams and how we sometimes avoid, mess up, or hide our dreams because we are afraid of failure.  Light bulb moment!  "Learn to enjoy where you are on the way to where you're going!"

3 Gifts:  1.  Outside:  No more rain!
              2.  Inside:  Clean, rearranged living room.
              3.  On a plate:  Left over pork roast, sauerkraut, and mashed potatoes!

Blessed day!

New Year...New Me!

My word for the year is...INTENTIONAL  I want to be more intentional about so many things this year but most of all my walk with God.  I don't want to be casual about it.  After my Walk to Emmaus in October I have been working towards this and have just decided there is no time like the present. Time is short!

So...I am joining Ann Voskamp's Joy Dare  3 things that I am thankful for each day!  Today is 3 Gifts Heard.

1.  Hubby laughing as he is watching football game on television.

2.  Music - in particular, Israel Haughton's "Moving Forward".

3.  Dogs barking to greet us when we pulled in the driveway.

I'm also joining Holley Gerth's 21 Day Challenge - "Do What You Can Plan".  I will be spending more time in His Word.  No more excuses!  I'm looking at a couple of plans on YouVersion.  Will post tomorrow which one I have decided to use!

If you care to join me...lets see what we can do!

Five Minute Friday's

I have been reading several blogs lately that have a Five Minute Friday. The rules are quite easy...for writers! Write for five minutes flat - no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking. I have been so inspired by these women! I can't tell you the number of times that I have read a blog posting and thought...that was exactly what I needed to hear! Now I know my writing is lousy. No funny stories, no pithy comments, no words of wisdom. But maybe...maybe I can allow God to shine through and encourage someone. And I will start with Five Minute Friday. Today's word is JOY.

Ready...set...start

Interesting word. I know all of the proper things I am to say. But the point that they were trying to get across is to CHOOSE JOY. How often am I amazed that people are able to see the wonders of God in a sunset which I don't even take the time to notice!

This is a choice we have. And I spend way WAY too much time wallering in my defeats or just worrying about things that are absolutely out of my control.

So, for this weekend...I am going to choose joy! Let's see what we can accomplish when I look at things from a cheerful, joyful position. God has blessed me tremendously.

Now I just need to live His blessings!!!

STOP...

Wow that was interesting. Not planning on doing anything with this like link to the blog but if you are curious to read some other takes on joy...check this out: http://thegypsymama.com

Have a great weekend!

More in the continuing sage with "T"

Since no one reads this blog I am using it to keep track of the stuff going on with T since the last time she had a list of everything I had done wrong...and since I don't care enough about all of this to waste brain cells I am going to do the documenting here. I mean, I swear this woman had a listing of EVERY possible time I had done something that she didn't like/hurt her feelings/or upset her in any way. The sad thing...I remember none of it. In most cases when she brought it up it shocked me that she was hurt. Anyway....

OK...this is the first Sunday evening we have had DT since our preacher left. I am the sub in his class so I figured it was my responsibility to plan something and I did. Even tho it was only a video! After our service, I announced that our class would be meeting in the sanctuary. At that time "T" came up to me and said something to the affect that she was surprised that I had something planned because she is the DT Director and all. I offered to back down she said no need, go ahead. And then informed me that she had talked to someone about teaching the class and he was looking at the material. First of all, we don't have material in this class. When I said that she said she had to talked to Bonnie about getting some and "he" was going to review the material and see if he was willing to teach. Would not tell me who when I questioned...which is fine. But NONE of this was discussed in our class. We spoke a few weeks ago when Byron resigned about the need for a man to step up...I don't feel I should be teaching this class. But we certainly didn't talk about any material.

Why do I let myself be upset by this kind of stuff? She is just flexing...but I did end up calling Bonnie and asking if I was out of line to be concerned. She had been presented with the need for material by T and was under the impression that we as a class had discussed it. So she didn't feel I was out of line but now as I write this I just continue to be sad. When we need to be circling the wagons this is coming up. AND I REFUSE TO LET SATAN INVOLVE ME IN ANYTHING THAT WILL BE HARMFUL TO MY CHURCH!!!

Enough said...

Run me over

WOW....still almost a week later (and after several interesting/sad events) I feel like I have been run over by a bus/truck/train!! Last Wednesday night I had the powwow with the preacher and the women in my church. We will call her "T". Basically, it all comes down to...she is jealous of my relationship with the preachers wife and is upset that I no longer talk to her. I tried to take the blame for that. I am not in a position to allow myself to be in conversations with her because I have been convicted of all the gossiping we did...I just need to stay away. But she feels that she no longer gossips as she has also been convicted. Unfortunately, I find that difficult to believe as she had a long convo with someone while her phone butt/boob dialed a friend....and the fact that this happened was told to me in confidence so I couldn't bring that up!! Bottom line, if I said it one time I said it six...I can't been the kind of friend she wants. Ended with Bryon disappointed with me because I didn't come back at her but I knew there was no hope in that and just pretty much kept my mouth shut!!

Then, things went from bad to worse. One of our deacons had been in the hospital for over 2 weeks. He really began to go downhill on Thursday, so I sent a text to my sunday school ladies (past and present) including T, asking for prayer. As he got worse through the day, I continued to update this group, including T, and she then was the one to call me to let me know that this man had passed. With the funeral, feeding the family and all apparently she is taking this to mean we are best buds again...!!!

So done with it all. The Gray family will be leaving on Friday. We are having one last hoorah at the church on Wednesday night. Am tired of crying...I am going to miss them terribly! I hope God has a terrific man ready to come to our church, and soon!

And the beat goes on...

Wow...since I had my last vomit of blog information to share there has been happenings at our church. Our pastor has resigned. UGH! As much as I hate this, it is strictly for selfish reasons. Once again, I have allowed myself to become personal friends with the preacher and, more importantly, his wife!! She is absolutely, without a doubt, my best friend here. The only person in the church that I feel able to open up even remotely!!! And now they are moving 2 hours away.

I have said I feel a peace about their move...he really has done all he can here until some folks decide to open up and make some changes. I know he is doing what God wants him to do but it is still going to be difficult. Not looking forward to is at all.

Then this morning I am told that he (the preacher) was approached by a woman in the church who has asked for a mediated meeting with me to see if we can straighten some things out. I knew immediately who he was talking about and I agreed. WOW...this should be interesting. How do you tell someone that the reason you don't speak with her anymore is because you have been convicted of gossiping?! I am alittle concerned however, because he said that these kind of meetings can be good or they can be hurtful. Makes me wonder what she has said to him about me!!! So, I am spending the rest of the day praying. Praying that I will keep my comments civil. Praying that I don't say anything out of anger. Because in the grand scheme of things, this friendship really doesn't mean much to me. I will never allow myself to be in a position where I will trust her with anything more that can be used against me!! Thank I need to pray about that attitude too...

MY LIFE...PART THREE

And I guess the thing that is concerning me most is my walk with God. I am struggling with everything lately. Quiet time is practically nonexistant. I spend way too much time trying to get inspiration from the internet...facebook...twitter. I mean they all can be good and I am just following Godly people but it so isn't necessary. And then I am critical of one church member. Who am I to be critical of her?!

I have attempted to do the Made to Crave bible study. Started with 8 people ended with just 2 of us. But why does that matter? The two of us got something out of it and those who didn't continue are the ones who missed out.

And then in Sunday School yesterday, I had a meltdown. In Sunday School. With Amanda. UGH!! I was interested in starting Lysa TerKeurst's More Than a Good Bible Study Girl study and we watched the first weeks DVD.

OH...and did I mention that the insprection stickers on both the VW and the truck expired the end of April? Just sayin...

Back on track. I want so much to have an accountability group. Atleast I think I do but after talking with Amanda I am not sure I really do. I mean it has become apparent to me that we talked alot in my family (dinner time for example) but we never really talked ABOUT anything that mattered. Eddie and I are the same way. I write this because I don't think I could ever make him understand my craziness. We talk about absolutely nothing that means anything. When we do talk it is usually me complaining/yelling and he just lets me rant. Wehave been together for more than 20 years and he still has no idea of the crazy things that go on in my head. The times I am grateful that I made it home without driving head on into a semi. WOW...actually said that out loud.

Need to get my mess straightened out...