I have been having an impressive pity party lately and last night I thought that maybe blogging would get things out and into perspective. So here goes...
Tanker came home and we prepared for deployment. In the meantime, he had a stress test and failed. Then they scheduled him for a heart cath. My crazy mind thought OK God...I have prayed he won't go back to Iraq and maybe a stint is your solution. And then he failed the heart cath! Actually, he did fine, the docs just felt there was too much damage to make repairs with stints and they sent us to the VA in Houston. Did I mention this happened right before Christmas...and that Bryce left to go "visit" his mother the day after Christmas? Another day...
So, we go to Houston. I want to start all this by saying the folks at the Houston VA are absolutely wonderful. We had terrific care at the hospital and I was allowed to stay at the Fisher House so, although I was responsible for my meals, all the housing was paid for and with 2+ weeks in the hospital we would have had an outrageous hotel bill. The Fisher House Foundation is on my favorite list of charities!!
Jan 3, 2010 arrive in Houston after an 8 hour drive. UGH!!! And I wouldn't let him drive after the heart cath so it was all on me! We were told their would be 2 or 3 days of testing and then they would do surgery (triple bypass). So we show up for a 9 AM appt on Monday with the cardiology team...begin going through a list of clinics to visit and by 3 PM they are calling to say that they will be doing the surgery tomorrow. TOMORROW...as in Tuesday!! Frantic calls to pastor who got in his car right away (bless you Byran) and MIL who was already on her way. I guess the good thing is we didn't have time to really get our heads around this...no time to be the Obsessive Compulsive Worrier that I have come to be so proficiently.
Jan 5, 2010 arrive at the Michael Debakey VA Medical Center bright and early and by 7 AM he is on his way to surgery. Fortunately, Byran got there around 8 AM so my time alone was limited. And now we wait...and wait...and wait. The only complaint I have is that I was told that someone would update me occasionally, but I didn't hear anything until the surgery was over. I got into see him around 3 PM in the SICU and fortunately Byran was with me because even though my mother had prepared me for all the tubes...I still didn't recognize him. He was on a vent, had chest tubes, and just was not his normal self. Fortunately, he did know I was there and I was able to spend some time with him, sent his mother in to see him and headed back to the Fisher House to crash. I don't think I have ever been that tired before...
From there "normal" recovery began. We had issues with his intestines not waking up very quickly, his white count not coming down very quickly and vertigo came to visit during the surgery and has not left. We were finally able to leave Houston on January 19, 2010 and this crazy girl decided to take the heart patient home after his 2 PM appt. that day...meaning we didn't get back to Forest until 11 PM. I know, not much sense but I really, REALLY needed to get home!!
I go through all this to catch you up. We are back home, I am back to work and each day seems to be a better one for Tanker. He is still on orders and I don't know what the National Guard will do with him. I am afraid they may medically retire him. There are pluses and minuses to that. As long as the paychecks keep coming in I am reserving my upset with the Army. I am sure that will come another day!!
Things are just different at home. Tanker gets up, moves to the couch, and heads back to bed for a nap occasionally. We are going to church but that is about it. He gets out to walk daily with a trip to WalMart every once in awhile.
I, on the other hand, am really struggling with this. He is doing better and I know in my mind that it is just a day at a time. But man...oh man...how did we end up here? Aren't we alittle young for this? Most days I just want to stay in the bed and unfortunately I am doing that most Saturdays. Last Sunday I got up, went to church, came home and crashed, got up for a 4:15 pm meeting at the church, went back home to bed, got back up and went to our Dave Ramsey meeting at the church at 7PM. How productive is that? I am trying to feed us more healthy foods and am successful once in a while but need to get focused.
We go back to Houston next weekend. We are having his mother and step-dad drive us (whole nother issue) and will get there in time to watch the Super Bowl in the hotel room. Then blood work and x-ray Monday morning and doc appt a 2:30 PM. My hope is they will release him to the Shreveport VA. They have got to get his vertigo under control because even if he wanted to he couldn't go back to work now...he is using a walker. Maybe we can trade that in for a cane...
So I am done fussing. I have SO much to be thankful for. I need to get busy and start doing some crafting and/or spring cleaning. My house sure needs it!!!
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